Bethenny has a baby girl. Ya gotta love Bethenny. On “Bethenny Gets Married?” she let’s the cameras roll sans makeup. All Bethenny wants to do is eat. Both she and Jason are too cute and so excited. It really seems very unstaged.

EXCEPT when Bethenny’s water broke. They definitely had to recreate that moment. But that’s ok – what did you expect - that the crew slept with them?

Jason did a great job calming Bethenny down when she wanted the baby nurse to come right away and freaked about the media finding out she was at the hospital. They really balance each other out.

And, how funny was Bethenny with her cry of “I’M CROWNING”! And I definitely agree with Bethenny regarding the epidural. There is NO REASON to be in such pain, when you don’t have to be. Ya gotta love how she thought she’d get to snooze and then everyone else fell asleep but her. I’m here to tell you that REALLY IS how it happens.

I’m sad for Bethenny that she delivered 5 weeks early and ended up with a C-section after 25 hours of labor. But lucky for Bethenny that she has a staff to help her get ready. Although Max was his usual ridiculous self putting the bassinet together. Julie as usual got everyone organized.

What a happy exciting time in Bethenny and Jason’s lives.

Hmmm… no other housewives from the Real Housewives of New York were there. Now she has her real friends.

Welcome Bryn! Mazel Bethenny – enjoy a JERSEY ORANGE CREAM cocktail when you’re done breast feeding!

This week’s episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey was not much fun to watch. Danielle bringing charges against Ashley. Ashley still acting like a spoiled child. Caroling trying to bring everybody to reality.

But what’s with Danielle acting like she’s the victim all of sudden.

Yes, Ashley yanked her hair. No Ashley definitely shouldn’t have done that. But Danielle trying to come off all innocent, and then boxing and pretending that one punch is for Teresa and one punch is for Jacqueline and swearing every 2 minutes just doesn’t make sense. It almost seems that her lawyers must be telling Danielle to act ‘normal’, but she can’t quite pull it off.

And on the Andy Cohen “Watch What Happens“, Danielle just shut down at times – like she didn’t want to lower herself to discuss certain things. Danielle said things like “I blogged about it” when viewers called in to ask about Danielle calling Ashley a coke whore. Danielle wants Ashley to be held accountable for her actions, but Danielle is like Teflon when someone tries to get her to own up to her actions. Maybe Danielle should have a Mango Beach Cocktail – it’s just as disappointing as Danielle’s answers.

When Andy asked Danielle if she had inside information on Teresa’s finances, she said YES but she didn’t think it was right to talk about her co-stars. BUT Danielle immediately told guest Jeff Lewis that she would tell him everything about Teresa after the show! Yeah, way to go – that should keep everything top secret!

Then Andy asked Danielle if she was dipping into the lesbian pool, Danielle said he’d have to “wait and see”. I think she is saying and doing anything to get media attention. So does that make her a prostitution media whore?

So let’s recap: Danielle made it clear that she doesn’t want anything to do with Teresa, Jacqueline, Ashley, and now Kim G. and Caroline doesn’t want anything to do with Danielle, so WHY IS DANIELLE ON THE SHOW????

Guess we’ll have to stay tuned next week to see if Ashley goes to the slammer. Here’s a tip Ashley. Don’t paint “f*ck u” on your finger nails when you go to see the judge!

T-Cee

Bethenny and Jason in St. Barts. Although I’m really happy for Bethenny and Jason, I have to say this week’s show was pretty slow.

But the good thing is that Bethenny is being very real. She’s not having her makeup done every second. She’s not getting all dressed up. In fact, I think she was looking a little dumpy. How mean of me. I know when you’re at that stage of pregnancy, nothing seems to look or feel good. But all the same, I think Bethenny could have dressed up just a tad.

And wow – it was amazing to see Bethenny eat. A lot. Like a real pregnant person. I did feel really sorry for Bethenny with her face and legs swelling up. I was lucky that my face did not swell when I was pregnant, but once when I was pregnant and traveling for work, I got to my hotel, lied down and got a glimpse of my ankles. YIKES! They had swollen sooo much from the airplane trip – it looked like elephantitis. In a panic, I called my OB/GYN and he tallked me down. So, Bethenny, I really do feel for you.

And, so far, Jason is holding up – still saying the right thing at the right time – telling Bethenny how the honeymoon is ending, but building a family is just starting. And, what a romantic dinner he planned on their last night at St. Barts with their table in a secluded are of the pool.

So, Bethenny and Jason are back in NY with Bethenny decorating the baby room and wanting only to have a happy healthy baby with a vagina! She cracks me up.

OK, we know the show was taped months ago, but I’m still looking forward to next week and the birth of Bethenny and Jason’s little girl.

Get ready for next week’s show with a Semi-HomeTested Cocktail, maybe the Sunburst Cooler.

Danielle drama.  AGAIN. Danielle’s crys of MY HAIR..MY HAIR.. I WANT TO GO HOME..I WANT THE POLICE… is worse than a B movie.  Are we really supposed to believe that Danielle is afraid of Teresa and Jacqueline?  Isn’t Danielle the one who last season threatened to come after everyone and that “she wouldn’t be alone” when she came knocking on their door?

Can the producers PLEASE get rid of Danielle, and return The Real Housewives of New Jersey to a sane level of women having fun and occasionally getting into b**ch sessions?

Teresa, did not let me down – she provided the comic relief in this whole crazy episode. Teresa made me laugh from her “Is Bi**ch Better?” remarks to Teresa’s humorous retelling of the evening’s events to her husband, Joe.

But do you know what is almost as annoying as Danielle trying to pass herself off as a scared innocent bystander? It’s Ashley. Why is Ashley suddenly a big part of the show? I don’t know about anyone else, but I have no interest in watching a spoiled, disrespectful teenager week after week. No matter what a BUTT Danielle is, Ashley should NOT have pulled Danielle’s hair, and Jacqueline is right to call her out on that.

But, hey, how funny was Jacqueline on the phone with the “energy psychic”? I loved when Jacqueline played games on her iphone while the psychic was sending her energy through the phone! And Jacqueline’s request to the “energy psychic” to WORK A LITTLE HARDER on Danielle was pretty funny.

Now, Ashley will most likely be facing legal charges. If Ashley’s smart, she’ll make nice with Jacqueline and her Dad, so they will help her out with that. Judging from Ashley’s contriteness on the “Watch What Happens” show with Andy Cohen, she is smartening up enough to pull herself out of that fire.

And Andy Cohen – can you look MORE uncomfortable on your own show? I would be uncomfortable too but why don’t you use your clout to change the cast on The Real Housewives of New Jersey?

What do you think? Who should go and who should stay on the cast of The Real Housewives of New Jersey next season?

At Last! Bethenny’s big day has arrived. And everything looks great. EXCEPT. There is no bathroom for the bride!

What??! The Four Seasons Hotel. That does gazillions of weddings?? That costs gazillions of $$. How could they not have a plan to accommodate the needs of a bride? Oh well – that is one moment I wish they had less of on the camera.

But what I did love were the wedding vows. They couldn’t be sweeeter and my hopes are that Bethenny and Jason will be able to stay out of the public eye enough to have a really great marriage.

So, the wedding planner did a great job. The maid of honor? – not so much. What did the maid of honor have to fall apart about? She did look and sound a wee bit intoxicated. Good for Bethenny to shoo her out of the dressing room and away from the cameras and off to do her maid of honor duties.

Everything seemed to go off without a hitch, but the reception did turn wild with groomsmen jumping in the pool. Happily Bethenny took it all in stride. I think we’ve all been to receptions where things got a little crazy – maybe even our own?

So, off to the honeymoon next week. Note to Bethenny - leave your work at home!

Be sure to take a look in my Semi-HomeTested Cocktails for your beverage of choice to accompany your viewing of next weeks Real Housewives of New York. May I suggest the PHILLY?

Bethenny’s big day is fast approaching. The number of things she must get done in 2 weeks is increasing. And so is the number of MELTDOWNS Bethenny is having.

Her poor wedding planner! He does seem to take her tantrums in stride – guess that’s part of the job.

And poor Jason! He got it right when he said he is between a rock and a hard place. Bethenny is mad because he won’t help with the wedding, but they both know Bethenny won’t let Jason actually do anything. All of us type A’s recognize ourselves there.

I have to say, I was really glad when Jason accused Bethenny of getting married only for the promotion and business aspects of it. Come on – weren’t we all thinking that? I sure was, and I’m glad it was brought out in the open. Jason and Bethenny really seem to love each other, and I think Jason will soften Bethenny by calling her out on things like that.

And how real – but oh so sad – was Bethenny when they met with the wedding officiant and she asked Bethenny who from her family would be there. NO ONE FROM HER FAMILY IS COMING. Didn’t you just want to cry with Bethenny?

Well, at least Bethenny has good friends to comfort her. The luncheon before the wedding showed that her new family will be just what she needs. And, I love the heartfelt gift that Bethenny gave Jason – the painting was too funny and soooo fitting.

Can’t wait to see the wedding next week! And I can’t wait to see if Bethenny will continue with the Real Housewives of New York – I kind of doubt it – unless they decide not to sign Jill and Kooky Kelly back up!

Well, be sure to try a Semi-HomeTested cocktail next time you watch BETHENNY GETS MARRIED? Tonight, I tried the Capri Fizz (pg. 108 Sandra Lee semi-homemade Cocktail Time) cocktail.

See ya all later!

Leave it to Teresa. To stir up the crazy in Danielle.

Teresa, Jacqueline, Ashley, Danielle, Kim D, and Kim G went to a fashion show. The camps were divided: Teresa, Jacqueline, and Kim D. at one table vs. Danielle, and Kim G (and an assortment of hangers on) at a table directly across from them.

Danielle even brought a ‘more acceptable’ thug/body guard so that Kim G. wouldn’t be offended.

The RHONJ managed to get through the dinner and fashion show with only flashes of angry looks darting at each other. Danielle spent most of the time fake cell phone talking since that is what her ‘buddy’ Paris Hilton taught her to do in stressful situations if Danielle needed to ‘diss’ anyone.

Then it happens. Teresa is missing. And where does Jacqueline find her? In the lobby. Waiting for Danielle. Waiting so Teresa can say Hello to Danielle. Oh Really!!!

Of course Teresa and Danielle take about 5 seconds to start swearing at each other and the show ends. The previews show what looks like someone getting into a physical fight – but probably not – I don’t think the producers want to be faced with lawsuits.

So, while you wait for next week’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey, enjoy a SHIMMERING SHIVER (pg. 98 Sandra Lee semi-homemade Cocktail Time).