Bravo Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion

Was this the Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion or a rerun of the old ‘Bobby woke up in the shower’ scene from the Dallas night time soap of the 80′s?  Let me explain.

Things started as usual on last night’s Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion, part 2.  Danielle was snarling innuendos, Teresa was hurling curse words, Caroline was incredulous, and Jacqueline was being snarky under her breath.

Once again, Danielle denied, denied, denied any and everything that was brought up.  Even when clips were rolled that showed her saying and doing things, Danielle would blame it on editing.  Jacqueline even got interesting, producing proof with her I Phone tweets that Danielle had wished that her daughter Ashley would die .  That Danielle, is beyond creepy and is way more menacing that Ashley’s innocuous comment of  ‘bye’, which Danielle thought had evil intents.

As usual, Andy Cohen could not get a straight (no pun intended) answer from Danielle. But Andy did apparently know that Danielle had a  fake head with a wig on it that she brought to demonstrate how the hair extension that Ashley yanked out, also pulled Danielle’s real hair out with it.  Super creepy!  And boring.

Everything was rolling along as usual until Jacqueline, almost as if on cue I must say, decided to forgive Danielle and apologized for her part in any upset during the last season.  Which prompted Danielle to practically scoop Jacqueline in her lap and hug Jacqueline for an uncomfortable 45 seconds, while Danielle whispered how she loves Jacqueline and all of the pain would now stop.  WHAT THE??

Teresa simply rolled her eyes, said something non-committal to Danielle.  Thank you Caroline for maintaining sanity and declaring ‘”This is bullsh*t”.

Andy Cohen, this was clearly staged and just plain schmaltzy!!!

So, that’s why I must ask – Did this remind anyone of the disappointing conclusion to the night time soap “Dallas” back in the 80′s when Bobby ‘woke up’ in the shower and the whole ridiculous season was deemed to be a dream?

Bravo – this was a huge let down. And totally not believable.

There is one bright spot in all of this and that is that Danielle will definitely NOT be back next season.

Oh, and rumor has it that Teresa’s sister-in-law (her brother’s wife) Melissa Gorga, will be one of the Real Housewives of New Jersey next season.

Leave a comment below and let me know what you think.

T-Cee

P.S.  I agree with Teresa – we don’t need Kim G.’s “old lady butt cracks”.

RHONJ will heads roll?

Will the meeting between Caroline and Danielle be calm and cleansing? Or will heads roll?

I think the tip off was that Danielle had ‘body guards’ that she now calls ‘security’ and that they had guns with them. Guns. Really?

Of course Caroline’s main reason for meeting with Danielle was to get her to drop the charges against Ashley. Which of course Danielle did not.

Danielle seems to be delusional, fixating on key phrases like ‘I deserve respect’ and ‘Caroline is the matriarch of her family and I (Danielle) am the matriarch of my family’. And of course Danielle had to throw in another dagger asking Caroline how it was working out for her now that her friends are being indicted. I assume Danielle is referring to Joe’s DUI and Ashley’s hair pulling charges. You could see that was the moment Caroline gave up trying to talk reasonably to Danielle.

And how funny is Caroline’s ‘you are a clown‘ line? Caroline of course was referring to the ludicrous life Danielle has lived to date. Danielle really had to think about that one, but all she could come back with was an insult to Caroline’s red ‘clown hair’. OK, don’t make us bring up your square boobies Danielle – which thanks to Kim G., we know waaaay too much about. So Caroline had to call Danielle garbage. Again. And at least Danielle took herself out this time. Like a good trash service. MEOW!

So, no table flipping. But I think it is clear to EVERYONE that Danielle could not possibly be part of the RHONJ next season. Yeah!

I just hope whatever Danielle does in the future, she does not drag her children into it like she did tonight – she actually made her girls thank and hug the ‘body guards’ for bringing mommy home alive. How weird for those poor kids.

BUT, it does look like we will have Kim G. on RHONJ next season, as Kim G.is making a guest appearance on the RHONJ reunion. Uggh. But I guess every show needs a person to hate.

I think the best part of the RHONJ reunion is going to be the discussion about what Danielle did to Dina and why Caroline called Danielle garbage at the last reunion and broke down crying. Hmmm. My theory is that Danielle had an affair with Dina’s husband – which would show he has absolutely no taste. I have absolutely nothing to base this on, but it’s usually an affair that breaks things as fast as Dina left the show.

What do you think happened?

T-Cee

Teresa created an amazing event. Again. This time for Audriana’s baby christening. 1/2 the show was devoted to this lavish event, and showed poor Joe super stressing out. Has he always been that grouchy and we never saw him much on the show? More likely, he is reacting to the fact that Teresa and Joe are bankrupt. How can they continue to spend money like this??? Who knows – maybe someone else paid for it. Joe seemed ready to implode all over Teresa, and she in Teresa fashion, just laughed and treated him like a smudge on her mirror.

Meanwhile, DINA WAS BACK!!! Yeah! It was so good to see her back on last night’s episode as Audriana’s godmother. I really hope they boot Danielle out and bring Dina back. Like I said before, cattiness is entertaining; thug watching is NOT.

And speaking of Danielle – the ugliness continues. I feel really bad for her kids. You can’t help but notice the comment her daughter made in the restaurant when Danielle got crazy about Teresa again “just another family dinner”.

How obviously over the top was Kim G. in her screeching fit against Danielle? BRAVO TV – please drop Danielle from the show and DO NOT SIGN UP Kim G. Bethenny was right on “Watch What Happens” that Kim G. is like a termite that worked her way into the show. Andy Cohen – deal with this mess! Thank-you!

So, same old, same old. If you’d like to try something different, try the Cranberry Margarita (pg. 112 Sandra Lee semi-homemade Cocktail Time)

And tell me what you think of the RHONJ mess.

T-Cee

This week’s episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey was not much fun to watch. Danielle bringing charges against Ashley. Ashley still acting like a spoiled child. Caroling trying to bring everybody to reality.

But what’s with Danielle acting like she’s the victim all of sudden.

Yes, Ashley yanked her hair. No Ashley definitely shouldn’t have done that. But Danielle trying to come off all innocent, and then boxing and pretending that one punch is for Teresa and one punch is for Jacqueline and swearing every 2 minutes just doesn’t make sense. It almost seems that her lawyers must be telling Danielle to act ‘normal’, but she can’t quite pull it off.

And on the Andy Cohen “Watch What Happens“, Danielle just shut down at times – like she didn’t want to lower herself to discuss certain things. Danielle said things like “I blogged about it” when viewers called in to ask about Danielle calling Ashley a coke whore. Danielle wants Ashley to be held accountable for her actions, but Danielle is like Teflon when someone tries to get her to own up to her actions. Maybe Danielle should have a Mango Beach Cocktail – it’s just as disappointing as Danielle’s answers.

When Andy asked Danielle if she had inside information on Teresa’s finances, she said YES but she didn’t think it was right to talk about her co-stars. BUT Danielle immediately told guest Jeff Lewis that she would tell him everything about Teresa after the show! Yeah, way to go – that should keep everything top secret!

Then Andy asked Danielle if she was dipping into the lesbian pool, Danielle said he’d have to “wait and see”. I think she is saying and doing anything to get media attention. So does that make her a prostitution media whore?

So let’s recap: Danielle made it clear that she doesn’t want anything to do with Teresa, Jacqueline, Ashley, and now Kim G. and Caroline doesn’t want anything to do with Danielle, so WHY IS DANIELLE ON THE SHOW????

Guess we’ll have to stay tuned next week to see if Ashley goes to the slammer. Here’s a tip Ashley. Don’t paint “f*ck u” on your finger nails when you go to see the judge!

T-Cee

Danielle drama.  AGAIN. Danielle’s crys of MY HAIR..MY HAIR.. I WANT TO GO HOME..I WANT THE POLICE… is worse than a B movie.  Are we really supposed to believe that Danielle is afraid of Teresa and Jacqueline?  Isn’t Danielle the one who last season threatened to come after everyone and that “she wouldn’t be alone” when she came knocking on their door?

Can the producers PLEASE get rid of Danielle, and return The Real Housewives of New Jersey to a sane level of women having fun and occasionally getting into b**ch sessions?

Teresa, did not let me down – she provided the comic relief in this whole crazy episode. Teresa made me laugh from her “Is Bi**ch Better?” remarks to Teresa’s humorous retelling of the evening’s events to her husband, Joe.

But do you know what is almost as annoying as Danielle trying to pass herself off as a scared innocent bystander? It’s Ashley. Why is Ashley suddenly a big part of the show? I don’t know about anyone else, but I have no interest in watching a spoiled, disrespectful teenager week after week. No matter what a BUTT Danielle is, Ashley should NOT have pulled Danielle’s hair, and Jacqueline is right to call her out on that.

But, hey, how funny was Jacqueline on the phone with the “energy psychic”? I loved when Jacqueline played games on her iphone while the psychic was sending her energy through the phone! And Jacqueline’s request to the “energy psychic” to WORK A LITTLE HARDER on Danielle was pretty funny.

Now, Ashley will most likely be facing legal charges. If Ashley’s smart, she’ll make nice with Jacqueline and her Dad, so they will help her out with that. Judging from Ashley’s contriteness on the “Watch What Happens” show with Andy Cohen, she is smartening up enough to pull herself out of that fire.

And Andy Cohen – can you look MORE uncomfortable on your own show? I would be uncomfortable too but why don’t you use your clout to change the cast on The Real Housewives of New Jersey?

What do you think? Who should go and who should stay on the cast of The Real Housewives of New Jersey next season?

Leave it to Teresa. To stir up the crazy in Danielle.

Teresa, Jacqueline, Ashley, Danielle, Kim D, and Kim G went to a fashion show. The camps were divided: Teresa, Jacqueline, and Kim D. at one table vs. Danielle, and Kim G (and an assortment of hangers on) at a table directly across from them.

Danielle even brought a ‘more acceptable’ thug/body guard so that Kim G. wouldn’t be offended.

The RHONJ managed to get through the dinner and fashion show with only flashes of angry looks darting at each other. Danielle spent most of the time fake cell phone talking since that is what her ‘buddy’ Paris Hilton taught her to do in stressful situations if Danielle needed to ‘diss’ anyone.

Then it happens. Teresa is missing. And where does Jacqueline find her? In the lobby. Waiting for Danielle. Waiting so Teresa can say Hello to Danielle. Oh Really!!!

Of course Teresa and Danielle take about 5 seconds to start swearing at each other and the show ends. The previews show what looks like someone getting into a physical fight – but probably not – I don’t think the producers want to be faced with lawsuits.

So, while you wait for next week’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey, enjoy a SHIMMERING SHIVER (pg. 98 Sandra Lee semi-homemade Cocktail Time).