Bravo Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion

Was this the Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion or a rerun of the old ‘Bobby woke up in the shower’ scene from the Dallas night time soap of the 80′s?  Let me explain.

Things started as usual on last night’s Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion, part 2.  Danielle was snarling innuendos, Teresa was hurling curse words, Caroline was incredulous, and Jacqueline was being snarky under her breath.

Once again, Danielle denied, denied, denied any and everything that was brought up.  Even when clips were rolled that showed her saying and doing things, Danielle would blame it on editing.  Jacqueline even got interesting, producing proof with her I Phone tweets that Danielle had wished that her daughter Ashley would die .  That Danielle, is beyond creepy and is way more menacing that Ashley’s innocuous comment of  ‘bye’, which Danielle thought had evil intents.

As usual, Andy Cohen could not get a straight (no pun intended) answer from Danielle. But Andy did apparently know that Danielle had a  fake head with a wig on it that she brought to demonstrate how the hair extension that Ashley yanked out, also pulled Danielle’s real hair out with it.  Super creepy!  And boring.

Everything was rolling along as usual until Jacqueline, almost as if on cue I must say, decided to forgive Danielle and apologized for her part in any upset during the last season.  Which prompted Danielle to practically scoop Jacqueline in her lap and hug Jacqueline for an uncomfortable 45 seconds, while Danielle whispered how she loves Jacqueline and all of the pain would now stop.  WHAT THE??

Teresa simply rolled her eyes, said something non-committal to Danielle.  Thank you Caroline for maintaining sanity and declaring ‘”This is bullsh*t”.

Andy Cohen, this was clearly staged and just plain schmaltzy!!!

So, that’s why I must ask – Did this remind anyone of the disappointing conclusion to the night time soap “Dallas” back in the 80′s when Bobby ‘woke up’ in the shower and the whole ridiculous season was deemed to be a dream?

Bravo – this was a huge let down. And totally not believable.

There is one bright spot in all of this and that is that Danielle will definitely NOT be back next season.

Oh, and rumor has it that Teresa’s sister-in-law (her brother’s wife) Melissa Gorga, will be one of the Real Housewives of New Jersey next season.

Leave a comment below and let me know what you think.

T-Cee

P.S.  I agree with Teresa – we don’t need Kim G.’s “old lady butt cracks”.

RHONJ will heads roll?

Will the meeting between Caroline and Danielle be calm and cleansing? Or will heads roll?

I think the tip off was that Danielle had ‘body guards’ that she now calls ‘security’ and that they had guns with them. Guns. Really?

Of course Caroline’s main reason for meeting with Danielle was to get her to drop the charges against Ashley. Which of course Danielle did not.

Danielle seems to be delusional, fixating on key phrases like ‘I deserve respect’ and ‘Caroline is the matriarch of her family and I (Danielle) am the matriarch of my family’. And of course Danielle had to throw in another dagger asking Caroline how it was working out for her now that her friends are being indicted. I assume Danielle is referring to Joe’s DUI and Ashley’s hair pulling charges. You could see that was the moment Caroline gave up trying to talk reasonably to Danielle.

And how funny is Caroline’s ‘you are a clown‘ line? Caroline of course was referring to the ludicrous life Danielle has lived to date. Danielle really had to think about that one, but all she could come back with was an insult to Caroline’s red ‘clown hair’. OK, don’t make us bring up your square boobies Danielle – which thanks to Kim G., we know waaaay too much about. So Caroline had to call Danielle garbage. Again. And at least Danielle took herself out this time. Like a good trash service. MEOW!

So, no table flipping. But I think it is clear to EVERYONE that Danielle could not possibly be part of the RHONJ next season. Yeah!

I just hope whatever Danielle does in the future, she does not drag her children into it like she did tonight – she actually made her girls thank and hug the ‘body guards’ for bringing mommy home alive. How weird for those poor kids.

BUT, it does look like we will have Kim G. on RHONJ next season, as Kim G.is making a guest appearance on the RHONJ reunion. Uggh. But I guess every show needs a person to hate.

I think the best part of the RHONJ reunion is going to be the discussion about what Danielle did to Dina and why Caroline called Danielle garbage at the last reunion and broke down crying. Hmmm. My theory is that Danielle had an affair with Dina’s husband – which would show he has absolutely no taste. I have absolutely nothing to base this on, but it’s usually an affair that breaks things as fast as Dina left the show.

What do you think happened?

T-Cee

Teresa Giudice and Joe overwhelmed

Teresa Giudice in Italy. Or is it LaLa Land. I know that Teresa likes to ignore things that aren’t what she wants, but has Teresa lost touch with reality? Milania seems to be in charge of both Teresa and Joe. Caroline and Albert appear fed up, and Jacqueline is blotto for most of the trip to Italy. And still Teresa plods forward. Is it just for the cameras at this point?

Joe is clearly angry about everything. No one on the show seems to be real happy right now. Maybe the “reality” of the show has just gotten to be too much. The whole Italy trip seems to waver between boring and out of control. Are Milania’s tantrums really the most interesting thing they had to film?

Are the RHONJ ‘real’ issues overshadowing the ‘reality show’ that was taped months ago? Not only have Teresa and Joe filed for bankruptcy, but just yesterday, Teresa had her lawyer in court trying to explain why they spent $60,000 after filing bankruptcy to get out of paying back the $11M they owe. Legally it was explained that she can do that since it was income Teresa earned after the bankruptcy filing. But, I have to say, it makes them look really irresponsible. And Joe still has his DUI issues to work out. So Milania’s tantrums must just be a distraction to them at this point. But not so much for the others with them – even Caroline said ‘I’ve had my kids already’. Caroline and Albert will be ready of a vacation from this vacation.

But, on the bright side, it is rumored that we won’t have to see Danielle on season 3. Danielle’s been given the Italy ‘boot’. Allegedly. We can only hope. I for one, do not want to watch any more of her crying over her “searching for my mother for 47 years” and in the next breath saying “if she is drinking, or on drugs, or homeless, I don’t want to have anything to do with her” — Oh really – which is it Danielle – you want your mother or you want to cry for the cameras?

I don’t know how this is all going to play out, but the reunion is sure to be explosive!

See you next week.

T-Cee

Bankrupt but shopping?

This week on RHONJ Teresa was still spending like crazy in Venice. First she ditched the guys ’cause she had to skootch on her heels to find Chanel. Which as Caroline dryly stated – there is a Chanel store right in NYC where they can shop everyday. But did this deter Teresa? NO. But amazingly enough Chanel was closed – shop owners apparently close the entire store to have lunch. Now I know this is true for little shops, but Chanel closing down for the lunch hour? Is this true? So Teresa manages to go into a jewelry store to buy some humongous green ring – not really sure what kind of stones it was, but hopefully, it was costume jewelry – isn’t Teresa supposed to be bankrupt?

Anyway, I normally like Teresa a lot, but during this Venice vacation, she was a tad annoying – insisting on doing what she wanted regardless of what anyone else wanted, even dumping her kids on Caroline and Albert for the day. But it was her non stop chattering that was over the top this week. Teresa was so busy talking that she almost bonked her head going under the bridge on the gondola – she needs to pay attention and sit down on the gondola! Uh oh – don’t tell Teresa I said that. Don’t want her flipping tables again.

And Joe. Joe looked super stressed. OK, Teresa and Joe filed for bankruptcy, and now here they are in Venice having what appears to be a very expensive vacation. Well I guess they also have to get over the stress of Joe being pulled over for driving under the influence. Joe’s story, and he’s sticking to it, is that he was really tired and he took a REALLY BIG YAWN and that’s what made him swipe 4 trees and crash his car. Joe’s story continues that he was so stressed afterwards that he walked to a (friend? relative?) house right from the accident and downed 3 or 4 scotches. And THAT’S when the police came and gave him the breathalyzer which of course Joe failed.

Oh Really! Well stranger things have happened and I guess we’ll have to let the New Jersey Police decide this one.

In the meantime, enjoy a Ciroc Blue Ocean cocktail (pg. 122 Sandra Lee semi-homemade Cocktail Time) and then tell me if you think Joe yawned or maybe passed out a little bit.

T-Cee

Teresa created an amazing event. Again. This time for Audriana’s baby christening. 1/2 the show was devoted to this lavish event, and showed poor Joe super stressing out. Has he always been that grouchy and we never saw him much on the show? More likely, he is reacting to the fact that Teresa and Joe are bankrupt. How can they continue to spend money like this??? Who knows – maybe someone else paid for it. Joe seemed ready to implode all over Teresa, and she in Teresa fashion, just laughed and treated him like a smudge on her mirror.

Meanwhile, DINA WAS BACK!!! Yeah! It was so good to see her back on last night’s episode as Audriana’s godmother. I really hope they boot Danielle out and bring Dina back. Like I said before, cattiness is entertaining; thug watching is NOT.

And speaking of Danielle – the ugliness continues. I feel really bad for her kids. You can’t help but notice the comment her daughter made in the restaurant when Danielle got crazy about Teresa again “just another family dinner”.

How obviously over the top was Kim G. in her screeching fit against Danielle? BRAVO TV – please drop Danielle from the show and DO NOT SIGN UP Kim G. Bethenny was right on “Watch What Happens” that Kim G. is like a termite that worked her way into the show. Andy Cohen – deal with this mess! Thank-you!

So, same old, same old. If you’d like to try something different, try the Cranberry Margarita (pg. 112 Sandra Lee semi-homemade Cocktail Time)

And tell me what you think of the RHONJ mess.

T-Cee

Danielle Staub. The housewife we love to hate. Danielle Staub is planning a party for her daughter Christina – and this time Christina is invited. It is her sweet sixteen after all. So they go party dress shopping and Danielle’s big concern is that Christina gets 3 outfits — apparently she will be changing outfits at the party.

But here’s the thing. Danielle made a big deal that Christina wanted to have this party for charity. And Danielle got everything donated for the party because of that. So what exactly was the fund raising part??? Did Danielle charge people to get into the sweet sixteen party?

I do have to say that Christina looked beautiful and both she and Jillian looked thrilled to see their dad. And, I hate to diss anyone’s kid, but Jillian singing – it was PAINFUL.

And once again, Danielle made everything about herself. What was with wearing her engagement ring from her ex-husband – you know that had to piss him off – and I’m sure his new wife must have felt creeped out by it. Even Christina had to remind Danielle before the party “your divorced from him”. WOW – Danielle is scary… and I mean crazy stalker kind of crazy.

Danielle’s ex cringed every time she hugged him. And am I the only one who thought Danielle was acting proprietary towards her ex with her “I felt it was really important that you be here” every 2 seconds.

OK, that’s Danielle drama. . . . Ashley’s drama continues.

So, I have to ask – is Ashley trying to get thrown in jail? Does she not get it? She was wrong to pull Danielle’s hair. She thinks getting a summons is a joke. Ashley stop talking about it and “weaveitalone”. I think she may find herself doing at least community service before this is all over. Maybe they’ll let her wear her mugly beret.

Oh, and I have to say Andy Cohen on “Watch What Happens” practically announced that Kim G. will be part of the RHONJ cast, by losing his train of thought and not answering when guest Rachel asked Andy if Kim G. would be a regular next season.

Well, I don’t like Kim G. (or D), but if they unload Danielle in the process, that would be worth a try.

Till next week – enjoy a Semi-HomeTested Cocktail. Maybe the Watermelon Spritzer.

T-Cee

This week’s episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey was not much fun to watch. Danielle bringing charges against Ashley. Ashley still acting like a spoiled child. Caroling trying to bring everybody to reality.

But what’s with Danielle acting like she’s the victim all of sudden.

Yes, Ashley yanked her hair. No Ashley definitely shouldn’t have done that. But Danielle trying to come off all innocent, and then boxing and pretending that one punch is for Teresa and one punch is for Jacqueline and swearing every 2 minutes just doesn’t make sense. It almost seems that her lawyers must be telling Danielle to act ‘normal’, but she can’t quite pull it off.

And on the Andy Cohen “Watch What Happens“, Danielle just shut down at times – like she didn’t want to lower herself to discuss certain things. Danielle said things like “I blogged about it” when viewers called in to ask about Danielle calling Ashley a coke whore. Danielle wants Ashley to be held accountable for her actions, but Danielle is like Teflon when someone tries to get her to own up to her actions. Maybe Danielle should have a Mango Beach Cocktail – it’s just as disappointing as Danielle’s answers.

When Andy asked Danielle if she had inside information on Teresa’s finances, she said YES but she didn’t think it was right to talk about her co-stars. BUT Danielle immediately told guest Jeff Lewis that she would tell him everything about Teresa after the show! Yeah, way to go – that should keep everything top secret!

Then Andy asked Danielle if she was dipping into the lesbian pool, Danielle said he’d have to “wait and see”. I think she is saying and doing anything to get media attention. So does that make her a prostitution media whore?

So let’s recap: Danielle made it clear that she doesn’t want anything to do with Teresa, Jacqueline, Ashley, and now Kim G. and Caroline doesn’t want anything to do with Danielle, so WHY IS DANIELLE ON THE SHOW????

Guess we’ll have to stay tuned next week to see if Ashley goes to the slammer. Here’s a tip Ashley. Don’t paint “f*ck u” on your finger nails when you go to see the judge!

T-Cee